An open relationship is when an individual or both partners in a relationship agree to have sexual partners. However, this comes after an agreement is reached by both partners.
Therefore, before one can be in an open relationship, there must be an understanding by the individuals involved.
Is Open Relationship Safe? My Experience
In my experience, an open relationship wasn’t safe for me. Honestly, I nearly lost my life while claiming that I was engaged in an open relationship.
Let me share this story with you. I was in a relationship with Monica, one of my classmates back in the day. Our time together was enough for me to conclude that I was deeply in love.
On a good day, one of her friends I never knew about visited our home, and Monica introduced her as a friend she never joked with.
Her friend, Jane, was so beautiful that no man could look away. Because she was Monica’s girlfriend, I decided to control my thoughts and feelings.
Though I was beginning to like Jane, I found it difficult to tell Monica.
One night, I decided to explain my feelings to Monica. I told her that I liked Jane but couldn’t summon the courage to tell her (Monica) and wasn’t ready to lose her. Shockingly, Monica told me she found out the first day Jane visited. She encouraged me to ask Jane out, and if she accepted, that would be fine with her.
I thought she was joking until she called Jane and told her about our discussion. Monica assured Jane that she would be happy knowing she was sharing her man with her best friend, and their relationship was in safe hands.
Monica kissed me, laid on me, and said my happiness mattered most to her. If being in an open relationship was what I wanted, she was cool with it.
I couldn’t sleep that night, finding it hard to believe even if an angel informed me beforehand that my girlfriend would say that to me.
The next morning, Jane visited, and we started talking. My girlfriend appeared calm, secure, and okay with the situation.
Two weeks into the open relationship, Jane became a headache for Monica. As Monica’s best friend, she did things not expected of her, hating to see Monica talking with me and expressing my love for Monica.
Unlike Jane, Monica didn’t feel bad when I talked about Jane. Each time I spoke about Jane’s unacceptable behaviour, Monica told me to take things easy, assuring me that things would fall into place.
The worst happened the day Jane fought with Monica over who would sleep on my bed that night. After a few weeks into the open relationship, Jane felt it necessary to share my bed instead of everyone being on the same bed.
They had a serious fight, and Monica ended up in the hospital. Before I could understand what was going on, Jane ran away with her belongings.
I took care of Monica’s hospital bills, and she was given the medical help she needed. I blamed myself for nurturing the desire for an open relationship. It never worked for me; instead, it nearly took the life of the woman I love.
On her sick bed, I begged Monica to forgive me for being interested in an open relationship, not thinking about the possibility of a futuristic disaster. I proposed to her, and she accepted to marry, promising never to love anyone else.
You and Open Relationships
What worked for me might not work for you. What worked for you might not work for me. This is life.
If being in an open relationship is okay for you and your partner can handle it, then it is fine. Feel free to get yourself involved, but where the reverse is the case, it is highly advised to keep off to avoid future crises.
Is Open Relationship the Same Thing As Cheating?
No, an open relationship is not the same as cheating.
Cheating in a relationship occurs when a partner is involved in sexual relationships outside the knowledge of their core partner. In an open relationship, partners engage in other sexual relationships with the approval of their partners.
Let’s take a practical example. Mr Golion is cheating in his relationship with Helen when he sleeps around with other women without her knowledge. In an open relationship, Helen is aware that Mr. Golion is in another sexual relationship with other ladies.
There must be an understanding between Helen and Golion for this relationship (open relationship) to work.
Wrapping Up
An open relationship is where partners seek acknowledgement from their partner when wishing to be involved in another sexual relationship.
Cheating is not recognized in an open relationship as long as both partners acknowledge it.
In conclusion, it is important to be aware of yourself when planning to be involved in an open relationship. Ensure that you and your partner(s) agree and are ready to accept anything that comes out of it, such as jealousy and hate.
