Catholic Church Near Me: How I nearly died

The story of How I nearly died in the Catholic Church near me is completely fictional. The story appears to bear some atoms of truth. Please do not disregard the truth portrayed in this fictitious story. The story is told to correct a menace going on in some of our various churches.

The Catholic Church near me was very dark beyond darkness

So because the Catholic Church near me was very close to my house I decided to crash inside.

My landlord locks the compound at exactly 10:00 pm. It was boldly written in the agreement papers that the gate will be locked against anybody once it is 10 pm.

This is not the first time that I am coming back home this late.The first time I came back home around 10:30 pm, the gate was shut against me.

The story continues after Advert

The story continues after AdvertThough I was new in the neighbourhood. But my landlord is this kind of strict fellow. He is so principled that he is uncompromisable.

Before I came into the compound he told me how he had broken his laws and decided to sleep in a hotel that was also close to our compound.

Before signing the agreement papers I wondered what could keep me outside my home till 10 pm.

Nothing. But I forgot the fact that I was a football freak. I love football matches so much, especially when Chelsea is playing.

Chelsea is my favourite team and I can never miss any of their matches for the world.

See why Goats stopped attending Catholic

I don’t have DStv or any digital cable or dish to watch any football match so I go to film halls to keep myself entertained with the world of football.

The story continues after Advert

This night it was late for me to return home. Instead of knocking at the gate and no one will respond to me, I should look for another alternative.

I remembered that there was a Catholic Church near me. This church was close to my residence.

And because the church was always open, I decided to sleep on one of the pills (long bench).

The Catholic Church near me was dark

My phone’s battery was dead and there was no way to see anyone or anything around.

I walked through the dark stretching out my hands to feel any chair like a man who suddenly became blind.

I lied down on one of the pills and slept off.

It was getting darker and I was already fast asleep.

At around 3 am, I started hearing some noises. The pills were making sounds as if someone was playing with them or trying to rearrange them.

At first, fear gripped me as I thought some evil spirits that operated at night had come to devour me.

While I tried to calm myself down to ascertain the voices I was hearing, I was able to differentiate the voices.

Though the voices were very low it gradually became clear.

I noticed that they were the voices of a man and a woman.

The woman was encouraging him to do more while the man was telling her that he is trying.

Read: what do you know about saints?

I couldn’t understand what was going on. Unfortunately, there was no light to see anyone.

I picked up the courage to walk through the dark and see for myself what is going on.

Getting close to the voices, the more it gets more clear.

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When I got closer you couldn’t believe what my eyes saw.

A man was having sex with a woman inside the Catholic church.”What!” was the only word I could think of then.

The two individuals stood up and started wearing their clothes.

“Inside the house of the Lord? You did not see anywhere else to have sex if not the house of God?” I asked, appearing disappointed and angry.

The young man unremorsefully told me to be careful about the way I talk to him.

That even got me more upset. I tried to raise my voice so that people would start running down to the church to ask questions.

Before I could know what happened, I woke up in the hospital.

Back forward to what happened

The story continues after Advert

While I was raising my voice to draw attention, the young man pulled out a gun and shot at me.Should I say that the gunshot was louder than my voice?

It was at the sound of the gunshot that the people I was raising an alarm for started coming.

Unfortunately, the demonic individuals had already left the church.

I called them demonic because no reasonable child of God can have sex in the house of the Lord.

I told the priest what happened and the following Sunday, the priest laid a curse on the perpetrators of the evil act.

The story continues after AdvertThe next Sunday, what happened was funny. I had recovered from the wound of the bullet. It was a scratch the bullet left on me.

While the priest was celebrating the mass, a young man and a young lady walked into the church kissing each other.

How they manoeuvred the security men is what I am still wondering.

While they kissed, they kept on crying. At intervals, their mouths would gum and be released.

The moment they are released they will be begging for help.

They confessed that for more than five days they have not stopped kissing themselves.

Finally, they confessed that they were the people that had sex in the church the previous Saturday.

The real identity of the young man who was nearly killed because I caught him having sex inside the Catholic Church near me has been revealed.

The church members bundled them out of the church and I heard that that was how they kept on kissing till they got knocked down by a moving vehicle.

Though the priest told them that he had absolved them from the curse laid upon them before their death.The end.


The Catholic Church near me and what you should learn

Even though this story is completely fictional, it is still important that we know that there are places restricted for certain things.

The house of the Lord is completely no place for lovemaking.

This story of how I nearly died in the Catholic Church near me should be a lesson to all reading this story.

It’s fictional but has some atoms of truth in it. Some of these things happen in our society today.

The church is not a place where you can have sex.

There are places for such.Do you have anything to say about this story? Kindly leave us a reply via the comments section below.


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3 Responses

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