My two female lecturers fought each other because of my cucumber.
I used to think that it was only a case between the male lecturers and female students.
It was recently that I knew that what existed among male lecturers also existed among their female colleagues.
As a course leader (course rep) I went to call one of my lecturers Mrs. Amadi.
She was to take us on ECO 225 a course in Economics that treats about the relationship between politics and the economy.
At her office, Mrs. Amadi told me to lock the door behind me.
I did as she had instructed without thinking anything.
She seductively walked to me and told me that I was handsome.
I said thank you ma and was ready to leave.
Immediately she held me back and grabbed my manhood.
“What are you doing ma” were the only words I could think of at that point in time.
“Your cucumber is very big and that’s the type I like,” she said.
“I can’t remember bringing in any cucumbers to your office ma” I said innocently.
The spoilt lecturer tried to force me into sleeping with her and I was able to overpower her.
I quickly opened the door and walked away as fast as my legs could carry me.
Mrs Amadi is about 65 years old and why she is after a young man of 22 years is what I can’t comprehend.
A boy who can be his grandchild.
I kept it as a secret but never knew that a fellow course rep had undergone the same embarrassing moment.
According to him, the woman threatened him of failing her course if he doesn’t pierce his cucumber in her large whole.
I cried within me when the boy said that he succumbed to the woman’s threat.
After their exams, the woman gave him a ‘C’
He went to her office to enquire why she gave him a C instead of an A.
The old lecturer told him that though he has a very big cucumber but she never enjoyed him.
She said, according to the narrator that he lacked the knowledge of how to have sex with a woman of her calibre.
The War Over My Cucumber
So after the ugly incident at Mrs Amadi’s office yesterday, the same repeated itself today.
As the new course rep I have come to call Mrs Emelda who is supposed to take our class by that hour.
On getting to her office, she was already coming out.
I just reminded her that it was time for her class.
She called me back as I turned to leave.
She asked me to enter her office which I did. She quickly threw herself on me and tried to rape me.
I raised my voice to shout at her and she said that if anyone enters her office coming to rescue me, that that will be my end in the school.
Fear gripped me as Mrs Emelda is one strong woman everyone fears in the whole of the Economics Department.
As she continued to try forcing herself on me, a knock came at the door.
It was Mrs Amadi.
Mrs Amadi is a superior to Mrs Emelda when it comes to academic superiority but Mrs Emelda is a year older than her.
She opened the office and when Mrs Amadi came in she saw me and wondered what I was doing there.
I tried to speak and Mrs Emelda interrupted me.
Mrs Amadi quickly understood what was going on and warned Mrs Emelda to stay away from me because my cucumber was hers and hers alone.
That is how the fight between my two female lecturers began.
While all this was happening, I already had my audio recorder recording everything that was going on.
Mrs Emelda was saying that that big cucumber is hers and Mrs Amadi on the other hand is saying that that cucumber was hers.
Even up to this very moment I can’t tell what a cucumber is.
The fight continued and the entire school was affected.
The two female lecturers were brought before the school panel and after thorough investigations and conclusions, it was agreed that the two lecturers forfeited their jobs.
Now you can imagine the kind of embarrassment these people have brought upon their families.
What kind of face will she ask for forgiveness with?
For clarity purpose, the use of cucumber in this story is used to replace manhood or penis.