When should parents stop making decisions for their children?

  As part of what I learnt today, I think it's perfect I shared.


Parents should understand that their is a particular time in the lives of their children when they need to stop making decisions for them.


When you make a decision for somebody, it invariably means you are living your life and at the same time living the life of that person.


A friend of mine who is at the age of 23 came to me and was telling me how he was tired with his parents making certain decisions for him.

According to him, he said that he wants to study law at the university but his parents are insisting he must study medicine else, they will have nothing to do with training him in school.

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Children at least from the age of 15 should be given the opportunity to make their own decision. Let them understand what it means to be the bearer of their problems.

Allowing a child the opportunity to make decisions, allows him the opportunity of taking responsibilities for his actions.

At this moment, parents are supposed to be their torchlight. Guild them as they attempt making their decisions.


In this century for crying out loud, parents should stop deciding for their children.

This children should be allowed the opportunity to express themselves and go for the achievement of their dreams and not the dreams of their parents.


When they clock 18 years, they should be allowed to make their decisions and take responsibilities for their actions. But this does not mean that you as parents should forsake your children because they have come of age.


Why parents should stop making decisions for their children


1. Lacking self-confidence

Constantly doing everything for your child or dictating how he should run his life will make the person lack self confidence in himself. When things come up, he will be running helter-skelter to find who will help him make a better decision since he do not trust himself to make the perfect decision.


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2. Controlling everything

Do you know that when you decide everything for a person, it invariably means that you are the chief owner of his life?

Maybe you do not know. Now am telling you.

Allow the children to be able to control their affairs. Let them feel what it means to be the owner of their own lives.


3. Marital crisis

Always concluding for your children makes you the main idea in their marital life.

They will always come to you for advice on how they can sleep with their partner or how many children they should give birth to. That is really insane.

Your consistent decision making for them even at adult age makes it difficult for them to quickly take responsibilities and as such depend on you for everything.

Parents should serve as guides to their adult children and not their decision makers.

Advice them where necessary and allow them to make their own decision.

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4. Dream killing

A good number of children has failed to achieve their dreams because their parents wanted them to achieve their own selfish dreams instead.

A girl crying because she was not given the opportunity to make decisions during childhood and it is affecting her from achieving her dreams

If a child wants to go into a profession, support him irrespective of the nature of that profession.

You can pull him out only when you know that such profession is illegal and will mean great harm to him and the family.


Wrapping up

Children are gifts from God and you have to treat them special.

Be their torchlight in every sphere of their lives but allow them the opportunity to make their decisions.


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